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How to Fix a Broken Relationship

If you and your partner are having serious problems, here’s advice from psychologists on how to start undoing the damage.
  • 21 March 2024
  • 4min

Being in a relationship means sharing experiences that are both joyous and challenging. Sharing a life together is not always easy. Sometimes, a crisis can shake the foundation of a relationship and leave it damaged.

But can a broken relationship be fixed? How do you even begin the process? These may be questions that you and/or your partner are grappling with right now. If so, here’s what psychologists advise about how to fix a broken relationship and strengthening the bonds between partners.

First, listen and try to understand each other

One of the most critical factors in fixing a broken relationship is open and honest communication.

The very first step is to listen to each other. Try to listen without judgment, argument, or problem-solving. Concentrate instead on trying to understand each other and the reasons you find yourselves where you are right now. Can you identify a common area of focus, something you both want to work on to improve?

Reaching an understanding and accepting each other's emotions and experiences is crucial for mending a broken relationship. Can you put yourself in your partner's shoes and see the situation from their perspective? How have you contributed to reaching this point, and what could you do differently?

Decide if you’re motivated enough to stay

When a relationship is in crisis, it's common for one or both partners to contemplate leaving. Repairing a broken relationship requires both partners to consider their motivation to stay together.

What do you truly want? Are you willing to stay a little longer and do your part to work on improving and the relationship? Ambivalence is common, but eventually, you’ll have to make a decision on whether you’ll commit to the relationship for a while longer.

Set off on a path to reconnect — together

It’s impossible to overstate the importance of teamwork in any journey to repair a broken relationship. Both partners have to set up a plan together for how to address the issues and work towards their shared goals.

The plan should include specific actions, tasks, and timelines. It should be like a roadmap that guides your efforts to reconnect.

If needed, seek professional help

Seeking support from a trained therapist or counselor can be necessary to repair a broken or damaged relationship, especially if your attempts to resolve the crisis on your own have been unsuccessful.

Collaborating with a trained psychologist or couples therapist can help you better understand each other's needs and discover new ways to communicate and rebuild trust.

Understand that healing from a broken relationship takes time

Healing a broken relationship won’t happen overnight. Remember to be patient with yourselves and each other. There will be setbacks and moments of frustration, but as long as you both remain committed to the process, it’s possible to overcome the challenges to your relationship.

Try to celebrate the small victories along the way. Recognize and appreciate the efforts you both put into making things better.

How you can resolve relationship issues on your own with the AllyCouples app

With the AllyCouples relationship app, you'll receive guidance and support for understanding relationship problems and working to resolve them. It’s a new form of self-guided couples therapy, available whenever and wherever you need it.

Through the app’s content and interactive exercises, you and your partner can find a way towards a stronger, healthier relationship. AllyCouples was developed by licensed psychologists Clara Zelleroth and Helga Johnsson Wennerdal to make the methods they use in couples therapy accessible to everyone.

Get started on building a stronger and closer relationship

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